Michael Meets Brooklyn (as told by Dolce)

So! You want to meet Brooklyn, I understand!

Between you and me, trust me, he's not all that exciting!

See what I mean? He just kind of sits there.
Sacha! Get away! I'm talking to Michael now, not you!

And what did I tell you? Look at Brooklyn Cruz now. As I was saying, after he just sits there for a minute or two, he conks right out. Dull, dull, dull.

Whereas, me, on the other hand...why I have all kinds of fun things to tell you about! For instance, did I ever tell you about my mink Fendi stroller, or the Dior La Forêt rings, they were to die for, and then there are the Fendi Peek-a-boo bags, extremely rare, but Brooke has one and India has one and Felicia has one and of course, I have too many to count, Takashi thinks it's funny that these rare Italian bags go from Milan to New York to Michigan, and oh, I forgot about the doves that I wanted Takashi to send to me, did I tell you about the doves? And then there was the adventure I had flying Britney's plane and hanging out with her boys, and did I tell you about the turtles that Felicia saved from certain death on the busy road the other day? There were two snappers and a regular turtle. I tried to put the regular one in my purse, but Felicia found it and let it go! I was so disappointed in her lack of imagination. I think she's going to do a post about them one of these days, one of them bit the end of Peaches' nose, can you believe it? The snappers were ginormous. A foot and a half long. I was going to send it to Takashi, not the big snapper, but the little box turtle that I put in my purse, to visit with Bunni, his python. By the by, did I tell you yet about Bunni? Sometimes I can't remember who I tell what, I mean, I'm here, there, everywhere, you just can't keep it all straight when you've got as many things going on as I do...I tell ya, it's not always easy. If you only knew! I just make it look easy. Because I'm a Pom, and that's what Poms do!!

Wait! Wait just a minute! Why is everyone always horning in on the conversation? Especially Sacha. She's sooooo needy. Love me! Love me! Who wants to love a dog who's always in your face, I ask you? You can't be in everyone's face 24/7, you have to stand back a bit and be a little stand offish, make them want you. Sacha has no self respect.

And Max, well, he always just sits in a corner, away from everything, but it's not because he's not needy, it's just that he's too old and tired to vie for attention, so don't give Max any credit.

I'm just the most interesting of all the dogs and I can't even help it. Poms are just like that. We can't help what we are. And what we are, are holy terrors, or at least that's what India and Felicia always say. I just had to laugh when I heard India say that. Holy terrors! Not even!! Did I tell you about the delicious Manolos I had for a snack the other day? And then, Felicia left out a 6' USB cord on the floor for me to chew the end off of. You'd think she'd have learned by now. And I love stealing her pens and ripping up her legal pads that she leaves by the side of the pool when she's trying to work on her latest novel. And once she left out a $100 8GB SD card that I found and chewed up. Yum! She was trying to upload photos and I heard her repeat over and over again, "Why is it saying card error? Why is it saying 'corrupt file'??" It was funny to see her yelling at me and getting all frustrated when she took the SD card out and noticed the teeth marks! I don't know why she didn't yell at the other dogs, she just ran straight to me, didn't even give me the benefit of the doubt. Isn't it, "Innocent until proven guilty"? And my favorite game? "Hide the Blackberry in the Bushes." And I have to tell you sometime about Takashi, he's so interesting, and I can't wait to meet Bunni, and hang at Morimoto...and...and...and....
Till tomorrow,
Love, Maia (*sigh*)